Writing Your Wedding Vows

Vows That Actually Mean Something ✨

How to Write Wedding Vows Without Feeling Awkward 📝🤍

There are few moments on your wedding day more personal than standing in front of the people you love and speaking directly to the person you're choosing for life.

And yet, for many couples, the thought of writing their own vows can feel terrifying.

What if I don't know what to say?

What if mine aren't as good as theirs?

What if I cry?

What if everyone thinks they're cheesy?

Take a breath.

Your vows aren't supposed to be a performance.

They're not a competition.

And they certainly don't need to sound like something from a romantic movie.

They simply need to sound like you.

The most memorable vows aren't necessarily the longest, funniest, or most poetic.

They're the ones that feel honest.

Your Vows Aren't a Speech

One of the easiest mistakes to make is treating your vows like a formal speech.

You don't need an introduction, three key points and a dramatic conclusion.

Your vows are a conversation between two people who have chosen each other.

Think less about "What will sound impressive?"

And more about:

"What do I genuinely want my partner to know?"

That shift alone can completely change how you write.

Start With Your Story

Before you try to write your vows, think about your relationship.

What brought you together?

What made you realise this person was different?

What moments have shaped your relationship?

Think about:

✨ Your first meeting
✨ Your first date
✨ The moment you knew you were falling in love
✨ Adventures you've shared
✨ Challenges you've overcome
✨ The moments when your partner showed up for you
✨ The little everyday things you love about them

You don't need to include all of these.

But thinking about them can unlock the words you're looking for.

Talk About the Little Things

Sometimes the most meaningful parts of a relationship aren't the grand gestures.

They're the everyday moments.

The coffee your partner makes for you.

The way they know when you've had a difficult day.

The ridiculous inside joke nobody else understands.

The way they make you laugh when you don't feel like laughing.

The small rituals you've created together.

These details make vows personal.

Anyone can say, "I promise to love you forever."

But when you talk about the tiny things that make your relationship yours, your vows become unmistakably personal.

Talk About What You Love About Them

This sounds obvious, but don't be afraid to get specific.

Instead of:

"You're kind."

Try exploring why their kindness matters to you.

Instead of:

"You make me happy."

Think about what they do that creates that feeling.

Perhaps you love their ability to make everyone feel welcome.

Their ridiculous sense of humour.

Their patience.

Their ambition.

Their loyalty.

Their ability to turn an ordinary Tuesday into something you'll remember.

Specificity creates emotion.

Then Make Your Promises

At the heart of your vows are promises.

But these don't have to be grand declarations.

In fact, some of the most beautiful promises are surprisingly simple.

You might promise to:

• Keep choosing each other

• Make space for each other's dreams

• Laugh together through the difficult moments

• Be their biggest supporter

• Keep creating adventures

• Listen, even when it's hard

• Never stop dating each other

• Build a home filled with love

• Stand beside them through every chapter

Your promises should reflect the relationship you're actually building — not the relationship you think you're supposed to describe.

Don't Try to Sound Like Someone Else

This is where many couples get stuck.

They read beautiful vows online and think:

"Mine don't sound like that."

Good.

They shouldn't.

If you're naturally funny, let some humour into your vows.

If you're sentimental, be sentimental.

If you're understated, keep them simple.

If your relationship is full of banter, don't suddenly become Shakespeare.

Your partner fell in love with you.

Not the version of you who writes perfectly polished wedding prose.

And Yes… You Might Cry

You might get emotional.

Your partner might cry.

Your celebrant might cry.

Your mum might cry.

Half the room might cry.

That's okay.

In fact, that's probably a sign that you're saying something that matters.

Don't try to eliminate emotion from your vows.

Instead, practise enough that you're familiar with your words, then allow yourself to actually experience the moment.

You don't need to deliver every sentence perfectly.

You just need to mean it.

Keep Your Vows Long Enough to Say Something — But Not Everything

There is no universal perfect length for wedding vows.

But remember that your vows are one part of the ceremony.

If you've written several pages, you may have written a love letter rather than vows.

A good place to start is by focusing on:

Your story → what you love → what you've learned → what you promise → what you're looking forward to.

Then edit.

Remove repetition.

Keep the lines that feel most like you.

And don't be afraid of simplicity.

Sometimes one honest sentence can carry more emotion than an entire paragraph.

Practise Without Turning It Into a Performance

Read your vows out loud.

Not just silently.

Out loud.

You'll immediately notice where sentences feel awkward, where you've repeated yourself, or where you're trying too hard to sound poetic.

Practising also helps you become familiar with the words.

But don't memorise every syllable if that creates pressure.

Having your vows printed or written beautifully on vow cards can give you something to hold and refer to on the day.

Your goal isn't perfect delivery.

It's confidence enough to stay present.

Your Celebrant Can Help More Than You Think

A great celebrant isn't simply the person who stands at the front and says the legal words.

They can help shape the entire emotional experience of your ceremony.

An experienced celebrant can help you:

✨ Find the right structure
✨ Understand what makes meaningful vows
✨ Balance humour and emotion
✨ Navigate nerves
✨ Create a ceremony that feels personal
✨ Keep the ceremony flowing naturally

Most importantly, they can help you feel comfortable being yourselves.

That's incredibly valuable when you're about to stand in front of everyone you love and say something deeply personal.

Consider Your Guests — But Write for Your Partner

Your vows will be heard by everyone in the room.

But they're not actually for everyone in the room.

They're for your partner.

That means you don't need to explain every inside joke.

You don't need to make every line entertaining.

And you don't need to write something designed to generate applause.

Write something your partner will remember.

Something they'll hear and think:

"That is exactly us."

What If You Don't Want to Write Your Own Vows?

Not every couple wants personal vows.

And that's completely okay.

Traditional vows, celebrant-led vows, cultural ceremonies and shared promises can be just as meaningful.

There is no rule that says a wedding has to look or sound a particular way.

The right ceremony is the one that feels authentic to the two of you.

The Words You'll Remember Long After the Flowers Are Gone 🤍

Flowers fade.

The cake gets eaten.

The music eventually stops.

The decorations are packed away.

But there are certain moments from your wedding day that stay with you forever.

The look on your partner's face.

The sound of their voice.

The promises you made.

The words that made you laugh.

The sentence that made you cry.

Your vows become part of the story you tell about your marriage for years to come.

So don't worry about making them perfect.

Make them true.

Make them personal.

Make them yours.

And when you stand there, looking at the person you're choosing for the rest of your life, remember:

**You're not performing.

You're promising.**

And those words deserve to mean something. 🤍✨

Find the Right Celebrant for Your Ceremony

Our directory connects couples with experienced celebrants who understand that your ceremony is about far more than getting through the formalities.

Find someone who can guide you, calm your nerves, tell your story beautifully and help you create a ceremony — and vows — that feel genuinely yours.

Because your wedding ceremony should sound like your love story, not someone else's. 💍

Planning your own dream wedding? 💍✨ The Forster Wedding Collective digital directory has curated a list of the best local vendors to bring your vision to life. From florists to stylists, find trusted experts who can help you create the wedding of your dreams.

Read more expert tips on the website.

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